Embracing sexuality? Challenging stereotypes

My article for this week is based on an observation that has sparked what I will call “the woman anger” in me and unfortunately there is no one to neither take it out on nor blame it on. Probably some people may differ with what I want to share but nonetheless I will share it.

A couple of days back I happened to change channels and I came across one of Beyoncé’s new videos; I don’t know what the title of the song is otherwise I would name & shame it. Out of curiosity I stopped to watch but all I can say is the first 20 seconds were too much and I quickly changed channels in dismay. From what I gathered in a couple of articles, she is said to be embracing her sexuality on her latest album. Obviously by embracing her sexuality it means posing almost naked throughout her songs, singing perverse lyrics and dancing sensually. Which I really have a problem with because I fail to understand why?

In typical man music videos, you always (without a doubt) find women wearing skimpy outfits dancing all over the show looking like hoochies but in staggering contradiction the content of the songs usually express loving a woman or showing her love. What do skimpy dressed - half naked women have to do with love? This goes to show how love and lust have become blurred over time and in the process, the value of what being a woman means has depreciated to that of a sex symbol. It is quite pathetic and sad at the same time. And what is even sadder; it is that we women embrace such negative stereotypes. We think it is ok when Nickie Minaj shows half her butt on screen; it is ok when Rihanna sings explicit sexual lyrics and it is ok when Beyonce dangles naked in her videos. (I know there is probably worse but I am just using these as an example) What we often fail to ask is: why do we feel the need to walk half naked, dance seductively and “embrace sexuality”?

This is because we are consciously and subconsciously led to believe that walking around half naked, being sexually forward, letting loose will make us feel needed and wanted, particularly by men - which is what we are continuously being fed by the media. What we fail to realize though is that in settling for such stereotypes not only are we selling out our woman dignity and honour but we are giving men leeway to view us from a place of lust and disregard instead of one of love and respect.  One thing that we need to understand is that we have been called to honour God with our bodies and not men, but somehow this truth seems to have been twisted the other way round to being “Our bodies are for men.” We do not consciously say this - outright but our actions imply it. 1 Corinthians 6:20 says “You were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body.” This means that as a woman you respect your body, you cover your body and you love your body to honour God. Romans 12:1 states “Therefore I urge you brethren, in view of God’s mercy to offer your bodies as living ssacrifices holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship.”

My argument in this article is that how can we women willingly engage in means that demean our own value? That fact that a woman can willingly dance seductively half naked in a music video means that she is for the idea of misuse. If we ask two important questions relating to the reasons why and for whom, it pinpoints to men – it is for men. Yes, you may be thinking “it is just music videos” “they are just making money” but problem is: this is the persona given to women at a large scale; it becomes a general representation of what a woman is supposed to look like and act like. And it is of detrimental effect because the next generation of women will grow up thinking that that is what being a woman means. I am speaking as a concerned woman and I am asking myself if this is what we have come to accept women to represent in our society; sex symbols? (Every other aspect of a woman being overshadowed) How many songs (for example) talk about woman intelligence, wit, strength, love, modesty, achievements etc.? Exactly my point, there are a few. Don't get me wrong my focus is not on music; I am using music as a basis for the general consensus in our society with relation to women and how women are viewed.   

What is to be done? By me writing this article I hope to have challenged each one of you to say it is not ok for us to be misrepresented and portrayed as sex symbols (that is if you do agree with the stated point of view). God created women to be a representation of honour, beauty, respect, His glory, modesty, strength and nobility. And this is what we should stand for in everything we do. Anything that is contrary demeans the purpose of God for women. What you do about this goes a long way and it determines what kind of generation you will raise. This does not mean go to the streets and start shouting that you are against women being projected as sex symbols but your change of attitude towards stimuli or subtle suggestions of such; will be the change that is needed to eradicate such negative stereotypes.